Now, I know the title can seem a bit confusing but stay with me and I can assure you that I can explain. Losing for the most part usually carries a negative connotation, especially in the gaming world. No one really likes to lose or to be labeled a loser, or even worse, be labeled a sore loser. We as gamers like a sense of winning, especially if we put all our time and effort to gain that ‘W’. But as I stated in my previous blog, each one of us has some sort of origin story. And in those origin stories I can guarantee there have been plenty of losses for each and every one of us. I can say personally that my record is probably a losing one. Anyways, over time I had to learn how to lose.
*GAME OVER*
Boy oh boy, there is just simply nothing like losing a game. We have all been there, period. Going back to my previous blog, ‘Thank you God for Pikachu’ I talked about facing others such as Gary, Brock, and even the Elite Four. I cannot quite remember, but I do believe I did beat Gary. But one thing I do remember is Brock beating my tail. I took a loss there and then; my new scene was in a Pokémon Center waiting for Nurse Joy to heal my beaten-up Pokémon. At the same time hoping I do not over press the ‘A’ button to re-heal them, if you know, you know. Anyways, I took a loss. At this time, I could not progress in my story because of this loss, my record went from undefeated to some wins with a one beside it. You know how that looks, something like (6-1, or 3-4). Usually in those cases, the win is presented first and the lost last. I do not remember how I felt, but I know I was not feeling fantastic and well-achieved for a 6-year-old. I would go on to lose many more battles, including random NPCs to the Elite Four. These losses were not limited to just Pokémon, but to many more games and scenarios in these games. For example, like Mario losing to Bowser, Link losing to Ganondorf, Sonic losing to Dr. Eggman, Pac-Man losing to one of the 4 Ghost, etc. And just for fun in this losing, I will list a few for my other friends, Cloud Strife losing to Sephiroth, Ryu losing to M. Bison, Mega Man losing to Dr. Wily, Simon Belmont losing to Dracula, Samus Aran losing to Ridley, and even shoot, Mario again losing to Donkey Kong. Regardless of the game, we have been there and lost. To be honest, my younger self never truly dealt with losing well. Depending on my age, knowledge of vocabulary, my physical strength, and other attributes usually resulted in how I expressed my emotions during these losses. Can you recall how you reacted to a loss? I am talking from a single loss to getting nowhere for hours, even days.
*RAGE QUIT*
The average cost of a gaming controller is $40-$60, the average cost for an entry-level TV is $300-$500, the average cost of a decent gaming headset is a little under $50, the average cost of a video game disk is somewhere around $70, your gaming systems cost around $500 now, and PCs could range from a few thousand dollars. The numbers vary, but I think you know where I am coming from with this. A lot of us have been here, we got mad, and our anger got the best of us and our said electronics. I am sure there are people out there that have it together: they lose, they accept it, they set their controller down, they turn off the device, and walk away. Not all of us. Some of us have taken the blame out on everything else, even the developers of the game, but ourselves. I have even been a victim of getting mad, and taking it a step too far, ending up with an electronic causality. Let us say that you did not take the blame out on the electronics, but you started to shout out who knows what at the TV, or even worse at yourself, verbally or mentally. I again, have been a suspect and victim of this. Going back to learning how to lose, it is not easy to mentally tone down your pride and not view yourself as a quitter, but to just take a deep breath, stop what you are doing, and just take a break for a minute. Easier said than done I know, but being on a path of demolition can be costly, being on a path of verbal warfare can be depressing. I am saying these things from experience, hoping that I can share with another that has dealt with this.
*Player #2*
If you did not already know, most game systems come with an extra port or even a few extra ports to seat in another controller for another player to play. That said, not every game is a solo game, some are multiplayer to an extent, and some are MMOG (massively multiplayer online game). So, from time to time you can absolutely play a game with another individual that was not a computer or COM for short. This a non-AI, leaving, breathing individual on the other side of the console. Now, playing with others can range from 1v1, co-op, team v team, etc. Some people can be pretty predictable about what they do, who they choose, and how they play. I believe I am one of those people, cough Kirby cough. I till this day always choose to play co-op just so I can avoid playing 1v1 with another person. Mostly from childhood trauma and my personal trauma I may have caused. Though I still like to play some sort of verses game, I use to avoid it because well, like I said, I have a losing record at that. And I truly do not like to lose. My younger self was absolutely not comfortable with losing, especially to the point if felt like it made me feel less of a human being. The bragging rights were always rubbed in my face. I would practice hard to beat the said individual in whatever game it was, and a lot of time, still lose. The losses triggered anger, and sometime resulted in foul exchanges, losses of friends, and awkward moments. I bear a lot of regrets in how I acted to my human competitors for beating me fair and square than I did with the computer. See, with the computer, no one else got to know, my losses were personal with the digital criminal mastermind. But with someone else, they knew, and potentially others did too. So, over time as I had to grow up, and had to learn how to lose. That being said again, not losing on purpose, but on how I responded to my loss. To this day, I am still working on this from a wide range of things, from games to everyday life. Like I stated above, no one likes to be labeled a sore loser, now I am not calling anyone a sore loser, but I absolutely was one. Especially when certain people would constantly press the “Down B” button, if you know, you know. (LOL) Games from solo to 1v1, from human to computer are made to be fun. Some may cringe at that statement, but having fun and showing good sportsmanship goes a long way. Trust me, every one of the Infinite Life members has been there and been upset at losing, and it is absolutely okay. Losing does not define who you are.
*You win some, you lose some*
As gamers, we have had times where we were stuck in front of the screen playing games for hours and even days. But eventually every gamer must step away from the games and return to everyday life, not Sims life (lol). Believe it or not, losing is not subjected to just video games, but to everything. Depending on your origin story, depends on what has happened to you on your own personal road. There have been many times I have personally felt lost or felt like I was losing in everyday life. This could be a wide range of things, such as money, my patience, time, sleep, relationships, my mind, my hearing, my vision, did I say time and money? Etc. Usually, those days of feeling like a loser resulted in a bad day. There have been times in my life it felt like every day was a Monday, or worse, a Monday in the middle of Atlanta’s busiest road, pouring down rain, at the beginning of a zombie apocalypse, and I am zero miles from empty. Sometimes it felt like I was the only one that had bad days, where I just lost at life every day. But can I assure you of something? We are not the only ones that have felt this way. Do you know why that is? It is because we live in a broken world. Some days do not seem so bad, and it just goes so well, and you just feel like a winner at life the entire day. But on days that you feel like a loser, how do you handle those days? Growing up I wish I could say that I handle those type of days like a champ, but on the contrary, most times it would break me. I would go on to turn that day sour, and just completely destroy it. I would even have such bad days as a loser that I would cause others to have bad days too. Sound familiar? It was almost like my gaming life and real life shared some similarities. I needed to learn how to handle these losses, and I figured out something, I could not do it alone.
*Jesus take the controller*
As I progressed through my story of my life, I got a chance to personally know the developer of my life. His name is Jesus. I told Jesus about all my problems, all my issues, all my losses. Awesomely enough, along the way in my life, Jesus placed people in my path to equip me with important items to help me on my journey. One of those important items was a bible, and in that bible, he asked me to believe in Him. But one thing that struck me weirdly was that he asked me to lose, I was bummed. “For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it.” – Matthew 16:25. I thought I was going to continue being a loser, but what Jesus was asking me was something bigger and spiritual. I needed to deny who I was, lose who I was, take up my cross and follow Him. Jesus would go on to tell me in these scriptures that He would be with me till the end of the age. Told me he who would believe in Him would have everlasting life. Jesus was personally comforting me with the power of the Holy Spirit telling me that I do not have to play this game called life solo. His Holy Spirit will co-op with me always. The bible did not tell me that I was going to stop losing, but it did tell me that His Grace was and always will be sufficient. That rain will fall on the just and unjust. The bible also told me that this Love he had for me, was for all the other Player 2’s out in the world and nothing could ever separate it. I saw the word ‘lose’, and the first time in my life, I felt like the biggest winner in the whole universe. I till this day, feel like the biggest winner, some days are still hard, but God is good. I want you the reader to know that same love is offered for you. I am so glad I learned how to lose, and I continue to learn how to lose as I grow in Christ. God Bless and game on!
